Another bopo bore.

Body positivity seems to be the new media buzzword these days. Gosh, that sounds cynical of me doesn’t it? Bear with me.

It’s no secret that our media promotes the insidious message of thinness being the archetype of beauty, success, and worthiness. This ultimate goal affects everyone who tries it: be it those who seek to attain it, or those who fight to maintain it. Every which way there is a problem for people to fix; trying to measure up to body types that, realistically, don’t even actually exist thanks to the power of Photoshop.

Everyone out there is battling with this toxicity that surrounds us. We’re all trying to come to terms with who we are and what we want for ourselves. But here’s the thing: some of us experience vastly more oppression and discrimination than others. That’s not to say that the expectations thrown at women are not harmful and painful for many but the oppression and discrimination levelled at fat people far outweighs that of thin people.

Body positivity, as a movement, is virtually unrecognisable anymore. Where it was once a tool to create spaces for the marginalised; be it fat people, disabled, POC, trans folks, and other groups, now it is a means for brands and media to appear to be sympathetic without having to actually acknowledge or cater for those marginalised groups.

Campaigns like #iamallwoman use the token call of body positivity to appear to give the middle finger to body policing while simultaneously upholding beauty ideals by using models who are typically attractive and –you guessed it-all thin.

Any criticisms levelled at these campaigns us met with disbelief, as though these meagre crumbs, that do not represent us are supposed to satisfy us. Promises of more inclusions to come, as though the radical inclusion couldn’t have just come in the first place.

This isn’t the fat community demanding that it be all about us, or that thin woman can’t be involved, but rather they, for one minute, take up the least proportion of representation. There are so many groups that can and should be represented that simply never are.  This is a movement for all but has now been co-opted for those with greater privilege to hijack a movement that doesn’t place them at the centre and call it unfair.

We are sick of being told that our turn is coming when it never does. 

There isn't enough room for all this bullshit

HelloGiggle.com recently shared this photograph from selling website/app Wish, that were advertising a pair of plus size shorts:

Charming, huh?

As noted in the HG article this is an incredibly cruel way to advertise clothing. Naturally there's been some uproar over social media. Christina, of Interrobang art, who makes and sells clothing up to a 34, posted this fantastic response on her Instagram account

But this isn't the first time this sort of cruel marketing has been used. AliExpress were under scrutiny back in 2015 for using this image to sell plus size leggings

The Big Bloomers Company, a site dedicated to plus size underwear use this to advertise their plus size tights

Aye, you keep smiling it up Sally Small.

I don't doubt there are many more, these are just the ones I was able to find first. So what's the issue? 

In laymans terms it's disrespectful as fuck to use this sort of strategy to advertise plus size clothing. 

The photos are utterly ridiculous, verging on comical and circus-esque. "Look how HUGE this product is! You can fit a whole other person with room to spare!"

And that's the thing, isn't it? We don't see fat people as real people but rather bodies that can't be comprehended without using "normal" bodies for scale. You want to advertise plus size clothing, and demonstrate how big your products are? USE ACTUAL FAT PEOPLE. Use a diverse range of sizes to demonstrate the variety of sizing you offer. "Here's a body wearing a size 12, and here's the same product in a 32." It's NOT HARD. 

There are so many fat people out there who would offer their services. Look at how plus size brands have tapped into using bloggers to model for them. The sizes are out there: you just won't use them.

Frankly I am sick of companies humiliating fat people and in the next breath taking our money. If they aren't using micro-aggresive language like "flattering", "slimming" and other such crap to suggest our fat can, and should, be magically hidden then they are outright removing us from their brick and mortar stores. 

What is even the logic in this? Do they not think fat people are going to take one look at this and close the fucking tab? Bullying people does not a profit make. Too long have companies tapped into a person's low self esteem to sell you a product you don't need, for an imaginary issue you don't even have. But people need clothes. What we don't need is being made out to be circus freaks. 

Photoshoot with Velvet D'Amour

Back in November I bumbled my bumpkin' butt down to London to meet with Velvet D'Amour for a photoshoot. 

I met with Velvet, and MUA Rachel Williamson, in a swanky apartment in Central London. They were immediatly warm and welcoming, with compliments and conversation flowing straight off the bat. I was so nervous because I'd never done anything like this and this was so out of my comfort zone. I was clueless as to what I was supposed to do. Velvet was so vivacious and her energy was infectious, and I soon started to loosen up a bit.

It goes without saying that I was floored with the results. Red and I had such a time choosing from the contact sheets. The experience was difficult at times; London is a hard place for me and because of my inexperience I felt I inconvenienced people at times but Velvet was gracious and understanding throughout the whole thing. I'm really glad for the experience. Sometimes it's worth stepping out of your comfort zone and making fun things happen!

Images courtesy of Velvet D'Amour

Hair and makeup by Rachel Williamson

New Year, Same Old Diet spiel: Is it time we ditched the tired tropes? Trigger warnings for diet talk.

“Every weight loss program, no matter how positively it’s packaged, whispers to you that you’re not right. You’re not good enough. You’re unacceptable and you need to be fixed.”

― Kim Brittingham, Read My Hips: How I Learned to Love My Body, Ditch Dieting, and Live Large

Fat acceptance and body positivity for some is a hard journey. For some it comes suddenly, for some it can be a life time of work. Discovering the body positive movement saved me. It saved me from the years of self-loathing, the decimation of my self-esteem, and helped me re-discover myself. But it also made me appreciate how complex body issues can be, especially as a fat person whose body is highly politicized and reviled by society.

Social media has provided a means for those in marginalised bodies to share and connect where mainstream media has deeply lacked. Navigating this can be a minefield, however.

Recently on my Instagram I found myself coming across many accounts using body positive tags, and importantly tags created by fat people, on weight loss posts and I’ll be honest, it got my heckles up.

It’s a hotly debated issue whether you can actively lose weight and claim to be body positive. I feel that the two are not mutually exclusive per se; you can advocate for people to be respected and loved regardless of size. But I draw the line at using fat positive tags for weight loss posts. I also resent how, when using said tags, there is then the use of health as justification for this.

Dieting, in of itself, is fatphobic. Despite scientificevidence that suggests long term weight loss is impossible for the majority it is still a practice that is actively encouraged. Why is this?

Many people explain that they are losing weight to be “healthier”. This is a fatphobic statement, suggesting that fatness equates to poor health. It is assumptive and wrong. Thinness does not equal health. You don’t need to lose weight to be “healthier”, nor do you need to lose weight to work on your fitness. There are plenty of fat people in the world who involved exercise and fitness regimes into their lifestyles. There is a difference between making healthy goals; i,e walking more, drinking more water, taking more supplements to "I want to be healthy so I will lose weight."

Health is different for every individual and there are many factors to consider, such as mental health and chronic illness. Using the size of your body as a framework for something as complex and individual as health is ill-considered.

Personally, if people want to lose weight, that is entirely their choice. But when you are actively participating in fat positive/body positive spaces I think you need to examine your reasons why you choose to participate in diet culture, a culture that actively oppresses fat people; a culture that is used to humiliate and degrade fat people and to eradicate fatness. Consider that assumptions about health in relation to fatness don’t come from nowhere and that we can all be influenced by a fatphobic society.

There's an increasing attitude within the BOPO/fat-posi movement that when people make criticisms of diet talk within these spaces they are somehow being “negative” or insensitive to other people’s personal journeys or lifestyle choices. Critiquing the content within our own movements is not negative, it’s necessary. We do not move and grow if we can’t examine our own contributions and the ideals we uphold. Weight loss may be a choice but it is unfair to ask these spaces to reassure people that they can stay comfortable in their “choice” to uphold fatphobic ideals.

It’s unfair to use fat positive media circles to promote yourself, while systematically upholding the idea that thinness is the standard for beauty and health.

The Curve Fashion Festival 2015 (part 2)

In this post I wanted to focus a little more on the festival itself. It's more than obvious I had a great time. But what was actually going on?

The event was held at the Manchester Central Convention Complex. As the space is designed to hold events like this there was a noticable different to previous events I had attended, mostly the space. There were wider areas to walk around. However a lot of the stalls were bunched together and it felt a bit like a Christmas market. If you stopped to talk to someone there was soon a bit of a jam with people struggling to get past.

There was a great mix of brands; high end and high street to independent companies. Not just clothing either! There was jewellery, a photography studio, artists, and my favourite: a spa treatment tent offering massages, manicures, and pedicures from as little as £5! After a long day on my feet my foot massage was a life saver!

Andrew Wood Photography had a little pop up studio for you to strike a pose!

With it being such a long day seating and refreshements are pretty important and these were provided with a pop up shop offering sandwiches and hot pasties, as well as fresh fruit, and hot and cold drinks. The seating was ok, but given that this was an event catering to bigger people I think it might have been appreciated to provide better seating than flimsy metal chairs with arms. Not so easily accessible for everyone. But it was certainly appreciated to have a space to take a breather and catch up with friends.

Also importantly was everything was on one level, including the toilets, and they were situtated just outside the conference room which was better for disability access and not wandering around a labyrinth and missing out on all the fun! 

The catwalk felt quite inaccessable for many that had paid. It was situated quite far back and unless you were lucky to get the side seats you were standing up at the back just to get a look. This was disappointing as attendees were charged to view the catwalks and I felt the layout should have been fairer. 

Speaking of the catwalk, this part of the event was the only real disappointment for me. Considering this was an event to celebrate plus size and curvy people the models used by every single brand were thin (and predominantly white too.) Very disappointing that brands who are happy to take our money refuse to use our bodies to represent them. 

No shade to the models who were all beautiful and just doing their jobs, but I felt it was inappropriate and a bit of slap in the face to have a whole day dedicated to the plus size, only to be let down this way. 

Needless to say I didn't attend the second catwalk. 

Thankfully this was the only real let down. The day was a roaring success and a great time had by all. I hope it continues to be a bigger, better event for years to come.

Did you go? What did you enjoy most?

She's A Beach: A Farewell To Summer.

That's it folks. All 5 days of it. /sarcasm.

Summer is over and with it the cooler nights drawing in quicker and leaves starting to tumble around us. Looking out of my window as I write this I see a grey sky and so I wanted to give a wistful farewell to summer. I felt this was also appropriate given a lot of negativity surrounding the plus size community with Nicole Arbour and recent let downs from Lane Bryant and Evans. 

This isn't a particularly ground breaking outfit but it was to me. This summer was the first time in my life that I wore a short skirt and my bare legs out. 

Fat girl with legs out; world falls into anarchy and chaos. Or not.

As someone who's pretty dang fat, and has been for most of her life, I can't tell you the fear that comes with baring your flesh. My tattoos have given me the confidence to bare my wobbly arms, and mostly because I loathe being too hot. But legs? My legs have always been a point of weakness for me. 

Strolling along that beach I almost felt angry at myself because the wind and the sun on my legs felt so amazing and I had denied myself it for so many years. But I had to remember that I'd also spent the majority of my twenty nine years being told that my body should be hidden, that it was disgusting to see, so how I felt had never really come into it. Turning your back on many years of learned, toxic self hatred takes time, so I let the disappointment pass and actually enjoyed how my body felt felt for once in my life. 

Sometimes you have to take a risk.

I'm glad I pushed myself out of my comfort zone. To know I can do this, that it's another step towards loving myself and not punishing myself for looking the way I do, as though I should be ashamed. 

Plus that sun feels damn good. 

The Curve Fashion Festival 2015

I'm on a count down. Only three weeks until the Curve Fashion Festival in Manchester!

What's The Curve Fashion Festival?

Well let me tell ya! CFF is a fantastic new event this year taking place at Manchester Central Exchange Hall. There's oodles of plus size fashion related fun waiting for you with confirmed brands including Asos, New Look, Boohoo, and Evans as well a bunch of indie brands to name a few!

What can I expect there?

There's going to be catwalks, celebrity panals, pop up meet and greets, shopping stalls from lots of fabulous plus size brands. Oh and did I mention there's a campagne bar and afternoon tea restaraunt?

Zoowee mama! You said celebrity panalists. Who's going to be there?

Tess Holliday, Hayley Hassellhoff, Style Me Curvy blogger Louise O'Reilly, and Nicolette Mason are but to name a few of the faces you'll see!

.........

There's a bunch of information about the event, including information about the venue itself and how to get there. You can find this, and more, at http://www.thecurvefashionfestival.co.uk/

This is a ticket only event! So don't miss out and grab yours here: http://www.thecurvefashionfestival.co.uk/tickets2.html

I'm super stoked for this event. Will I see you there?

........

You can find me on Tumblr & Instagram! 

Wedded Bliss

Having been on a bit of a hiatus I'm snatching a quiet moment while visiting family up north. I guess it qualifies as my summer holiday? So, last week I attended by cousins wedding.

After catching a gorgeous vintage bus to the church, a lovely traditional ceremony, and then a bus trip to the venue it was time for dinner, speeches and dancing (and a little bit of blubbing.)

There was a fancy dress box, a sweetie bar, and games which all made for a fantastic evening.

A lovely summer wedding calls for lovely summer colours. This dress from Praslin has been sitting in my wardrobe since last year. I picked it up on eBay for about £30. 

The material is just gorgeous.  A lovely soft cotton that was nice and light and so was ideal for a long day to keep me cool. The dress is also fully lined. The cross over deep v neckline gave me plenty of room for my boobs. In fact a little too much room so for a little modesty in family company I had to get a couple of safety pins. 

To complete my look I treated myself to a beautiful hair flower from Lady Luck's Boutique. I had a real job choosing from the many, many amazing flowers but I figured a wedding called for big so I opted for the 'Queenie' Stargazer Lily and Cherry flower.  I also picked up a pair of their Oversized Round Tiki Bamboo earrings. I'd really struggled to find bamboo jewellery and these were the cheapest I'd found. Always a bonus!

My handbag was a real find! I discovered an amazing rockabilly website in Germany called Killer Kirsche, who stock so many handbags I'm now coveting that I'm pretty much set for the next 40 Christmas and birthdays. I picked up this adorable Kustenluder basket. 

My biggest bargain were these hella cute espadrille wedges I got from eBay for £8.99 secondhand. Turns out they were Russell and Bromley who, if like me, you had no idea who they were retail for around £250+! My'shawl' is actually an infinity scarf I picked up from Primark about a year ago for a couple of quid and voila! 

Are you attending any weddings this summer? 

Skinny shaming or: not everyone cares about your diet, Mandy.

There's been an article floating around my various social media feeds that I wanted to address.


"I was skinny shamed by fat friends!" declares Mandy Appleyard as she tells us that after losing her menopausal weight that she was "shamed" by her friends. Mandy's definition of 'shaming' meaning:

"You're such a skinny-minny, you don't need to lose weight" and "Ridiculous! You're middle-aged, you should be eating what you want now."

So while not an overall nice thing to say the general idea here is that Mandy's friends think she's perfectly ok the way she is and she should feel free to eat what she pleases and not worry about it.

Ok, so anyone making unwarrented comments on your body is absolutely not ok, and those people need to know this. But this whole article feels like an opportunity for Mandy to rant about her shitty friends because several times throughout the article mentions how no one has congratulated her or given her a "pat on the back" as though these things are owed to her.

But what I really wanted to talk about was how easily this term "thin-shaming" is being tossed around and why I really don't like it.

Thin-shaming, for one, is co-opting language used to describe the oppression faced by fat people. By making the terms similar it is suggesting that the experiences are the same.

They are not. Not by a long way.

As I said earlier, people making unwarrented comments about your body and what you choose to it are not ok. But they are in no way comparative to the systematic abuse and prejudice faced by fat people. 

Even before she lost her extra weight Mandy would not be what I would consider a fat person. So even before she lost her extra weight she could rest easy knowing that there isn't a multi-billion dolar industry telling her that her body is wrong and needs to be eradicated. Mandy can rest easy knowing that she won't be denied the chance to adopt or receive fertility treatment based purely on her size. Mandy can rest easy knowing she is less likely to be given inadequate medical treatment or misdiagnosed due to her weight. Mandy can rest easy knowing she won't be less likely to be employed because of her size, or paid less in the job she has. She can live her daily life in relative ease in relation to her body because she won't see bodies like hers on tv being used solely as a punchline, or humiliated on weight-loss shows. She will see her body size in every magazine, newspaper, and billboard. Mandy won't have her body associated with negative personality traits like laziness, ignorance, and greed simply because of her size. Mandy can walk into any high street store and find clothes that fit that aren't priced out because of her size.

Mandy says that she would "never call a larger person fat so why is it ok for them to call her skinny"

You know why, Mandy? Because it's ok to be skinny. You're allowed to be skinny. It's encouraged to be skinny. It should be ok to be any size you want, but that isn't the world we live in. You need to get back into reality and learn the difference between having your feelings hurt and being systematically dehumanized at every turn. 

Steve Miller, can you not?

According to former-fattie Steve Miller, the irrelevant banshee of fat hate from Fat Families, fat people don't have a sex life and are not found attractive.

I can only assume this wretched dullard has some book or some shit coming out soon and he's being especially antagonistic. Maybe he got bored with his cancer rants?
I'm curious to know what Steve Miller *thinks* he knows about the inner workings of other people's lives but considering he appears to barely have a soul I'm not sure he's really an authority on anything other than to hate fat people because he hates himself too.

Like any fat-hater with a platform they are unable to tell the difference between correlation and causation. Sometimes being fat puts you at higher risk of certain disases, but this isn't ever 100% of the case AND it's not the cause. It can be related but that's it. So scaremongering with providing no scientific evidence is pretty standard.

What's interesting about this particular outburst is he's trying to play on a lot of what the fat community works to improve on. Fat people ARE marginilised and kept out of mainstream media, and through blogging platforms and other areas, we work to improve our visibility. By using it against us to contradict us he thinks this somehow gives his bullshit any legitimacy. But it's also a very real, very human element to it that he can use, moreso than trying to push the easily refutable 'science' he spouts.

However, my biggest issue with this is coming from both sides. Naturally people are firing back with their own evidence of relationships, babies, and excellent counterpoints. But why are we even indulging in this narrative that sex and desirability are at the core of our value and self worth? Why is it only when people find us attractive does that invalidate any fat hate?

Someone doesn't find me attractive? Big fucking deal.

Some people aren't interested in sex at all. Lets stop erasing asexual identities with these bullshit narratives. Stop giving creedence to this ridiculous argument. Fat bodies are already fetishized and objectified by those that do want to fuck us. In turn fat bodies are ridiculed and reviled by those who don't. Stop both sides deciding that their fucking boners are worth shit.

Steve Miller, I couldn't care less of you, or anyone else wants to fuck me because my sexual desireability isn't the core of worth. What I think of myself matters more.

A Plus kinda week.

I'm currently up north in the Lake District visiting family. The weather has been wonderful, the scenery has been breathtaking, and seeing my family after five months has been really amazing. I haven't had much chance to be online aside from checking in on my phone. What a week to dip out of social media! .
This week we've seen Plus Size Wars hitting the tv, and like anything that puts plus size people in a remotely positive light, there is the usual furore. Then we had Jamelia, former popstar and now gob-for-hire on Looose Women (blergh), made some heinous comments about people in "extreme" sizes, noting "they" should feel comfortable when trying to buy clothes and in fact sizing that is less than a 6 and greater than a 20 shouldn't be available in stores.
The plus size community fired back with Debz from A Wannabee Princess creating a hashtag #WeAreTheThey. You can find the original posts from her here.

The basic premise was that people like Jamelia want to talk about "they" without considering that "they" are real people. So this hashtag put faces to the anonymous people that were being spoken about with little to no thought or consideration.

The hashtag took off, and even made it into mainstream media. The plus size commnity really came together and made their voices heard. It was amazing to watch it snowball over a few hours. I felt helpless, hiding out in the middle of nowhere with barely any signal. I have been slowlyl catching up now I'm in a more signal friendly part of the lakes. Everyone's pieces have been wonderful to read; sharing their heartache growing up fat, sharing their insecuritites and their own journeys to self acceptance.

What people like Jamelia seem to conveniently forget, when they preach about loving yourself but so long as you are "healthy", is that health is NOT an obligation and it is certainly not a measure of worth. But most importantly is that when she, and people like her, talk about how people in these sizes shouldn't have these things seems to think that we actually HAVE these things.
If people really knew how fat people were treated on a daily basis; how fat people are given inadequate medical care, less likely to get jobs, are physically abused, humilated, and used as a societal scapegoat for just about everything wrong, she would think twice before suggesting that simply by trying to live in peace was "gloryfying obesity".

I don't care if you think being fat is going to make my joints all fall off. I don't care if you think that being fat will clog my arteries and stop my heart. I don't care if you think that being fat will give me diabetes. I don't care of you think that being fat is a strain on the NHS (have you ever bothered to ask WHAT the money is spent on?). Even if all those things were true (they aren't) that is MY choice and you don't have a say in it (No your tax money isn't funding it.).

You don't get to make me feel less of a human being because I am fat. You don't get to make me feel less of a human being for anything.

Rocketeer reporting for duty! Featuring Hell Bunny

So I'm a bit slow on the uptake (nothing new, right?) but I'm finally usting out my Curverella t-shirt from Nicky Rockets after purchasing it at Plus North in August last year. Shortly after the attending the event I injured my back and by the time I was up and about again it was jumper weather. So here it is and man I LOVE it.

The stall was manned by the simply gorgeous Betty Pamper, who was really sweet and helpful. She advised me on the best size to choose and she was bang on. It fits like a dream! I opted for the slash neck.

The sizing is very generous with the material having a decent stretch to it. The fabric is high quality, as is the print ink. I love the tongue in cheek designs, especially the B-movie horror vibe. Perfect!

What prompted me to dig this little gem out was the recent arrival of my first Hell Bunny piece. 

I'd been on the hunt for a plain jacket with the weather warming up slightly. As with most of my endeavours into plain things I come out with something all singing and all dancing.

There's nothing plain about this amazing Sadie 50's Baseball Style jacket in red and black. 

The fabric is thick and soft, the jacket being fully lined with its corrosponding colours. The colours are very rich and vibrant. There are two stitched designs which are excellent quality; one on the front and a huge back piece.

As with all vintage repro I buy the biggest and cross my fingers a I try it on. It fits, but is slightly snug towards the bottom. It sits on my hips so if you prefer something longer this won't be for you. I have room to swing my arms without any buttons popping open. Success!

Now I can grab a milkshake at my local diner and gaze scornfully at all the squares.

Jacket: Bought on ebay at MaggieAnn Vintage Store--4XL

T-shirt: Nicky Rockets (I can't remember the size and there's no tag. Possibly a 3 or 4Xl?)

Mini skirt: New Look Inspire via eBay

Leggings:Evans

Boots: Doc Martens via eBay.

Pyjama Project

I had been thinking for sometime about the fat-posi media I was consuming. As someone just getting into fatshion blogging I found myself following lots of blogs for inspiration and to find out the who's-who of fat blogging. But I became more and more aware that I was seeing a lot of the same thing. Inspired by my last post, about the imperfections being ok, I realised that I was seeing a lot of polished, perfect images. High fashion, or highfemme-which are amazing in their own right and I'm super grateful they exist-but there was very little in the way of those who don't subscribe to that either because they don't want to or an unable to for whatever reason, and those people are important too.

So it was for this reason that I started the Pyjama Project. A submissions based Tumblr where fat people can submit images of themselves in their comfy clothes, baggy tees, ugly nighties, lazy day off clothes, face masks, messy hair--and be celebrated for being fab. It was pretty daunting and I didn't exect much of a reception, but there has been some great support so far. I'm not exactly 'tumblr famous' or barely even a drop in the blogging ocean but I wanted to do my bit and I hope it doesn't fall flat at the first hurdle.

If you're interested in submitting you don't need to have a Tumblr account. You can submit 'anon' and just leave any details you want like any social media platforms and the like.

This was my submission. Eeek!

Colour Pop

This post is an unexpected lesson in confidence. Sometimes you shine without intending to.
It's not secret that when it comes to fashion I'm about as lazy as it gets and having been off work for along time I've lived in my pajamas. Getting the motivation to get dressed and go out has been difficult. But challenge accepted and overcome the other day as I, unusually, put my hair up and slicked on some lippy before tottering out to run some errands.

My trusty old coat. A love saga through the ages.

My outfit wasn't anything special. Comfortable and simple black and white, with a little colour pop from my trusty Doc Martens, I wasn't setting Vogue aquiver.

Leggings (as pants?! Heathen!) from Evans

Black and white striped dress from Asda (old)

Cherry patches added by me.

Boots-Doc Martens.

But for all it's comfort and simplicity I got numerous compliments from strangers while out. I hadn't really thought about it much but I think a lot of it is was down to the fact that I was just really feeling myself that day. I got ready and snapped a selfie for Instagram because why the hell not? The compliments and kind words sent me out with a skip in my step which seemed to carry with me for the rest of the day,

The power of kind words. 

So the next time someone rolls their eyes and decries selfies as 'vain' and 'shallow' just remember how good it feels to feel good, and how that goodness shines out. 

"Light attracts light. But sometimes your light attracts moths and your warmth attracts parasites. Protect your space and energy." --Warsan Shire.

OOTD: Pink because the boys stink (the devils in the details)

The weather has been really unkind to my skin lately; I'm dry and flaky as well as breaking out, not to mention I have roots for miles. What better time to pick up a camera, right? I guess if it feels right you gotta go with it.

So you know when you buy a piece of clothing and you think "Yup. This is the thing I'm going to wear for the rest of my life." That's kinda how it was for me when I picked up this gorgeous Pink Fluffy Jumper from New Look Inspire. 

I'd had my eye on a similar one at Simply Be, but when I saw this reduced to £12 I had to make it mine. 

Mmmm. Sooo floooofy

It comes in a lovely eyelash material and is much more vibrant than the website photo gives it credit for. Oh man is this thing soft. Angel hair soft. Fluffy kitten soft. Gatdang soft, ok? Not to mention warm. My house, being so old, get pretty cold at times and this has kept me more than warm and snug. Did I mention it's soft?

It's a nice length. Not too short (although I'd kill for this in cropped) and not too long. I'm not great with the whole "boyfriend cardi" look, I just kinda look like a kid trying on their mums clothes. 

I put this with a simple pair of black skinny jeans (jeans whaaaat?!) and my black Demonia maryjanes. I've yet to master the fine art of taking full length pictures with my feet in. 

The devilish details? Well, I figured because this is so lovely and vibrant, and with the busy eyelash material, I didn't want to over complicate it. I stuck with the pink theme and minimal accessories. Cue these beauties: Tickled Pink Flamigo drop earrings from Black Heart Creatives.

I love Black Heart Creatives because they are so fun and adorably kitsch. But also well made and good quality. It helps even more that they are an independant business with excellent customer service. I had an issue with a previous purchase and they couldn't have been more helpful and friendly. If you haven't gotten anything yet, stick it on your list because they are a must!

I finished this look with pink brows, pink glittery eyemake up and pink lipstick (An early one from the Kate Moss range with Rimmel). Obviously 

Obesity: the real cost could be your life.

I had the displeasure of trawling through celebrity choreographer and Loose Women panellist Arlene Phillips twitter after she posted a hashtag she was trying to trend: #fitnotfat. The usual apologetic diatribe you’d expect from someone telling fat people to “close their mouths” and “pick up a skipping rope.” Naturally, my heckles went up and I had a few choice words.

But after I calmed down, and with cup of tea firmly in hand, I started to think about why yet another hashtag, why yet another anti-fat campaign was rearing its ugly head. January is a loathed month for most fat people as our social media news feeds begin to clog with the “New year, new me!” mantras as people’s self-loathing drips like sweat at the newly joined gym.

Not that I feel it’s necessary but I want to preface this with a couple of things.

Firstly I am not claiming to be, nor have I ever claimed to be, a medical professional. These are my opinions, my thoughts, based off my own lived experiences and my own reading. It is very easy for people to scoff and undermine me because medical professionals allegedly know better than I do. But know this: doctors are people too and therefore will carry their own biases. Fat people are more likely to receive inaccurate medical care.

These biases and fat shaming is killing people.

There are documented incidents where people have sought outtheir healthcare professional for unrelated issues and STILL been told to loseweight. 

Twitter hashtag: #diagnosisfat

 My doctor thought it was appropriate to address the issue of bariatric surgery when I went in to discuss HIVES. 

In fact that was why the BMI chart was created in the first place: by insurance companies and was introduced in the early 19th century by a Belgian named Lambert Adolphe Jacques Quetelet. He was a mathematician, not a physician. He produced the formula to give a quick and easy way to measure the degree of obesity of the general population to assist the government in allocating resources.

I’m not saying that weight doesn’t carry risks. But what I am saying is question just how much risk, instead of what people are telling you because you can't really be sure how much of their concern is pourely objective and factual. As you’ll read on you’ll see these figures being thrown at us are based off very old research models.

Also remember that one of the people responsible for changing the BMI guidelines in 1998 was on the board for weight loss company Weight Watchers who also recieved huge financial support from weight loss pharmecuticals. Don’t think that people couldn’t possibly have an agenda just because its healthcare. The healthcare industry is BIG MONEY.

There are a lot of scary figures out there about what obesity costs the NHS. If there’s one thing that is going to put fat people in place is the guilt of pressuring a precious, and already strained, resource like our free healthcare system. Who would take you seriously then?

But I got to thinking, sure enough I’d seen enough figures in the billions, but I’d never seen an actual breakdown of the costs. WHAT was costing £4 billion? You can’t just say “obesity”. It’s a very vague term and tells us literally nothing. 

David Cameron gave a speech where he stated that obesity was costing the NHS £4 billion a year, with an expectation of it rising to £6.5 billion by 2015. This figure coming from the Department of Health and estimated by Foresight report: https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/reducing-obesity-modelling-future-trends

I found a website hat stated the report was “..looking at current obesity and associated costs and sought to model future trends in obesity and its impact on health. Doing this, the study produced a series of cost estimates for obesity to the NHS, for elevated Body Mass Index (BMI) to the NHS, and the wider costs to the economy of elevated BMI. All of the projections are set at 2007 costs for easy comparison.”

Wait..hold up. There’s that horrible little word again: BMI.

HELP! IT'S THE ATTACK OF THE MEDICALLY INACCURATE HEALTH MODEL!

Immediately my eyebrow went up in a quizzical stance. If we are created a supposedly accurate report then why are we referencing a proven inaccurate model like the BMI scale?

For those who don’t know, the BMI has been proven to be inaccurate. 

As I continued to read the website it stated that : “The Foresight report goes into some detail on the associated conditions. For example, the note that: “The risk of developing type 2 diabetes, for instance, is some 20–80 (OK, anyone else think that is a huge jump?) times more likely for people who are obese compared with lean people. Coronary heart disease (which itself is slightly more common among obese people) is 2–3 times more common among diabetic men and five times more common among diabetic women.) Other health risks are also mentioned, such as strokes, many cancers, and osteoarthritis. “

Associated. Associated conditions. Herein lies the problem. Many people fail to realise that correlation does not equal causation. So while there is a risk factor, it is not fat exclusive diseases we are dealing with. The only thing that I can think of that is directly associated with obesity is mobility caused by a fat body, and even then this is only in extreme cases where people have become bedbound by their size.

Another thing I found interesting was that since that report was published in 2007 there has been no significant research into the economic costs of obesity, according to the National Obesity Observatory. So everything we are reading is based off an outdated model. These figures are also based on upon obesity levels where no action is taken to address the problem. So general and outdated still. Most research since has been based in the US and not from Europe.

So where does that bring us? I don’t feel any closer to understanding the real, factual impact of Obesity ™ on the NHS. Given that all of the reports used an outdated, inaccurate, and medically false mode in which to group people it gives it a crumbling foundation insofar as all diagnoses made in terms of health and diseases are based off an inaccurate guide. Simply put the bmi scale says you’re obese-you are “treated” for being obese (medication, surgery, healthcare initiatives)-NHS picks up the bill. But if the BMI is inaccurate then how much treatment is necessary?

Every woman?

So recently Kelly Osbourne just announced her new clothing like Stories by KO. 

"I can finally reveal I am releasing my debut clothing line Stories by Kelly Osbourne next month! This has been 10 years in the making so to say I'm excited (and a little nervous) is an understatement. Stories...by Kelly Osbourne is for EVERY women, because I believe fashion should be fair! That's why every single piece will be in a size 0-24. Yes, you heard me! This is for you ALL! I'll be launching live on @hsn on September 25! I can't wait to see how you all create your own stories with my pieces! XO"

So, where to begin? 

I want to preface this by saying that I understand that another plus size range is obviously a step in the right direction. I get that. But can we just stop and just take stock a minute? 

"...is for EVERY women!"

Unless you're over a 24. Which a lot of fat people are. The way this is being presented is as if this is something revolutionary. A 24?! Way to go!!

Well..can I say..no. No, actually. This isn't inclusive at all. I can buy size 24 clothes in Asda for goodness sake. 24 is the cusp of acceptable fatness. You only have to read the comments on the Facebook photo to ascern how the general public feel about anyone bigger. 

When you have companies like Asos and Domino Dollhouse putting out some pretty on trend and quirky pieces in larger sizes I have to wonder what are we getting so excited about?

I don't think a lot of people appreciate how tough it is to be over a size 24 and to care about your apperance. Keeping up with fashion, or developing your own style, is a lot of hard work and dedication. You have to learn how to work a lot of basics. You work on accessorising because sometimes that's the best you've got. 

Truthfully I have maybe 5 stores I can shop at. Most of them online and overseas so there's additional shiopping/import tax costs to factor in. 

 Plus having an alternative style it can be even harder to accomodate for. 

Once again I will be watching from the sidelines as smaller fats get to dip their toe in the designer pool.

OOTD: Bank holiday sundae

The sun has been out! Can you believe it? It's been a hectic few months for me. I moved house and have been up to my neck in tins of this and that, boxes, paintbrushes and all that fun stuff. But now the days are getting warmer, I've started planting flowers now I have a garden and I'm curious to see how this new chapter works out.

So, the boy and I took a trip out to a local animal sanctuary to sample their vegan cafe menu and this is what I wore.

I was in my local Asda recently checking out their sale racks. Typically they had nothing in my size. Then I spotted this adorable blouse, which they also had in a lovely cornflower blue. Half price at only a fiver! Size 22. Damn. But it was too cute to pass up. If I could get it over my bust I was golden. Huzzah! Success!

The blouse is really doft and light but enough to keep you comfortable if a cool breeze kicks in. Very comfortable. Its cute enough to wear out on a day out, but also comfy enough to wear while running errands.
I've never worn shirts like this before and I'm kicking myself for it. Shirts abandoned as I got bigger are now wardrobe contenders again. I have another two super cute shirts that I plan on giving the knot treatment so eyes peeled.

If there's one thing I have it's hair accessories. A fail safe gift it seems as I have an overflowing boxful. This cutie was gifted but if memory serves its from Cupcakes and Chopsticks.

Necklace comes from Pieces of the Past. A total bargain at £3, I bought it at a local fat swap. Perfect length and amazing quality. Sadly Paula has decided to close the shop so grab a bargain while you can!

Finally have an excuse to wear my Vans. I'm a sucker for tropical print. Its a close second to my first love, polkadots. These are so comfy. Wearing them without socks isn't an issue.

Earrings are gifted.